There's no denying that the second generation iPod shuffle is a tiny, screenless thing. It's almost smaller than the earbuds that connect to it. "It's so small!" said Amy Lamb. "I'd sit on it and break it." However, in Apple's words it's "born to be worn." Yes, I can see the fad—iPod shuffles are the accessory of the future! Right. As for me, I'd rather sport a punk pin than an mp3 player. Music should be heard, not seen.

The shuffle is also advertised as "random meets rhythm." Fancy words, basic function. Even the dinosaur-esque original iPod can shuffle your songs, and I might add that, out of over 400 songs, five Breaking Benjamin songs in a row is hardly random. The last catchphrase? "Everything is easy." Sure, everything is easy when you don't have a screen. Who needs to know what they're listening to, as long as it sounds good? And if it doesn't sound good, well, just suck it up until the next song comes on, because you need a microscope to find the buttons.

The few other qualities it sports are hardly enough to win over the buyer. It holds 240 songs—about half the number I have, which isn't nearly enough to satisfy. The "remixed colors" are disappointing as well: the classic silver, eye-blinding blue, sea foam green, purple-blue, and let's not forget the red one, a blatant advertisement for Gap's (PRODUCT) RED. This is by far the best, because everyone I know wants to be a walking billboard.

As for the ancient first generation shuffle, it hardly deserves a mention, differing from the second gen only in that it looks like a ridiculous cross between a TV remote and a magic wand.

All in all, unless you're blind, much more fashionably challenged than most, and have memorized the titles of your meager collection of 240 songs, your money would be better spent on another form of iPod.